Saturday, November 5, 2011

The Unpublished: X, Y, and Everything Else Super

          X, Y, and Everything Else Super is short story written by LexiHall. The story line follows a couple, Kayla and Dan, as they are sucked into another world via a portal. The two encounter villains from this new world, and are almost immediately forced to defend their lives. In doing so, they discover new talent they never knew they had...or perhaps they didn't have to begin with.

          I wasn't incredibly impressed with the cover, which almost always gets my attention first, even before pitches. I didn't really see how the picture pertained to the story. The colors seemed to clash as well -- don't get me wrong, black and white are fine, but it just wasn't working for this particular cover. Had I been in a bookstore, I almost certainly wouldn't have picked it up.

          Moving into the story. The characters cursed enough to turn me off, as well as cast a negative light on my first impressions of them. Character depth is definitively an area that needs work in this story. Other than what was point black told to the reader, I didn't get a feel for who they really were, what they were like, what they wanted in life. They lacked the realness that pulls the reader in.

          I say brief instances of really great imagery, and strong sentences throughout the story, and I would really like to see a bit more. The author clearly has it in him/her to have solid imagery, it just didn't seem to come out very often in this particular project. A little more work and this point would really strengthen the story.

          Not going to lie, I loved one of the villain's weapon choice -- a fire truck red laser gun. Not sure I'd go for the fire truck red one, but if I had to choose, laser gun would be my pick. I mean really, wouldn't you want to fry people to a crisp in milliseconds? (I'm being completely serious here, by the way.)

          While this project has a few points that could be strengthened, LexiHall did a good job in the overall writing, and I see the potential for it growing into a great piece of writing.

Rating: (3/5)


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